April 4, 2006
While some people had the thrill of owning Albert Pujols, Chris Shelton or Roy Oswalt on Monday, others had to suffer through these nasty fantasy lines on Opening day:
Jorge Posada: 0-for-3 in Yankees 15-2 win.
Barry Zito: 1.1 IP, 4 H, 7 ER, 4 BB
Jon Lieber: 3.1 IP, 9 H, 8 ER
While Posada and Lieber will still give you their annual mediocre stats, Zito owners have to be a little nervous right now that the 2004/early-2005 version of him has returned.
Some other thoughts:
While working for MLB.com has been an amazing experience, I do miss the thrill of Opening Day from a fan’s perspective. When baseball is your job, no matter how much fun it is, you can’t take the day off from work and sit home and watch baseball all day. I’m not complaining, but the day definitely feels different from my days of listening on my walkman in high school, or just playing sick.
My favorite Opening Day memory:
When Don Mattingly stole first base in the first inning of the Yankees ’91 opener in Detroit. The Hit Man had one steal all of 1990, but led the Majors in steals for at least a few minutes that season. These are the things that excite you when you are 16 years old and talk to your Strat-O-Matic team more than girls.
I wonder if Jose Cruz and Aaron Miles are enjoying the fact that they are currently the National League hit leaders with four. Odds on that lasting more than a week: 45,392-1.
My worst Opening Day memory:
The Yankees’ 1988 opener. After years of waiting for my building to get cable, it finally arrived prior to the start of the ’88 season. About 10 minutes before the Yankees were about to begin their season, the cable company had still forgotten to switch off the Home Shopping Network (which shared the same channel as Sports Channel on our cable system). I went nuts, called the cable company, but couldn’t get through. The problem lasted into the fifth inning before the game finally came on with the Yankees already up 6-0.
Something that has nothing to do with baseball:
One of our editors reminded me this morning about one of the worst cartoons ever created. In the fall of 1983, the "Mister T" cartoon began airing (lasted 16 episodes). The premise was that Mr. T and a bunch of gymnasts would fight crime together while on some gymnastics tour. Amazing that someone actually thought this was a good or creative idea. I imagine the discussion between the show’s producers went something like this:
Producer 1:"Let’s come up with the most random group of people to team up with Mr. T as we can. How ’bout gardeners, they can stab criminals with their rakes? "
Producer 2: "Good, but what about plumbers, they can crack open pipes and drown people to death?"
Producer 1: "That’s better, but… wait, I got it. Let’s have a bunch of young gymnasts do backflips, handsprings and kicks to help Mr. T get the bad guys."
Producer 2: "Great idea, how has no one thought of this already?"
Guinness Commerical Guy (making a random appearance in this fake conversation from 23 years ago): "Brilliant!"
Joe Theismann: "That’s the best idea I’ve ever heard."
And finally for today…
For those of you who have been reading my column for the past five years (my dad, wife and a few friends), I’m going to experiment doing it in blog form in 2006. Not sure how long this will last, or if I’ll choose to go back to the old format, but I think I have more of a shot of being amusing for the first time since 2001 if I’m just able to write randomly whenever I feel like it.